Shit Happens

Every once in awhile I like to take a gander at some of the things I wrote in the past. In part see how my writing has evolved, but honestly it’s like a reflection of where I have been. Like looking at your life in a rear view mirror, only when you get far enough away can you see the whole landscape of a situation that you miss when you’re fully immersed in it. I have been through some shit-childhood stuff, loss of love ones, financial instability (aka broke AF), infertility, adoption, divorce, illness, the list goes on. We all have our shit, and to quote Forest Gump, “Shit Happens”.

Someone said to me recently that “this shouldn’t have happened to you” in reference to the ongoing saga of IgA Nephropathy. I agreed that it shouldn’t have, but followed it up with “who should it have?”. Trust me when I tell you I am not trying to play the martyr. I will complain and whine when I have to and rage at the injustice of it all on occasion, but most days I got this. Everyday I wake up and accept my reality. Yes I have an autoimmune disorder that kicks my ass, but most days I feel a little better than the prior one. There are days I am spent and don’t want to go work, but I am fortunate that I have a decently paying job that supports me and the kids. I find my work rewarding most days, and I have co-workers I look forward to seeing on a daily basis. I may have suffered infertility and many failed IVF attempts, but it lead me down the path to adoption. Adopting my girls will forever be the greatest thing I ever did. Shit happens man, you got to roll with the punches or it will roll right over you leaving you covered in it.

Personally I think the greatest stumbling blocks lies in not embracing our shit. Own it! You have shit, we all do. Like it says on the rear view mirror says, objects in the mirror are closer than they appear. We often need to get far enough away from a situation to really see it. While submersed in it we see only what is directly affecting us at that moment. Whether it be heartache or joy, at the time it is all consuming. We often make decisions and sweeping change based on our narrow views in the moment. Even on the days I fail to do so, I can honestly say that I try not to. I am learning not to give the power to the past to dictate the future. Perspective is a powerful thing, that is impossible to achieve in a moment. Time and distance makes us wiser. So in short my friends shit will always happen, it’s how you handle your shit that defines you.