Ode to Prednisone…

Inspired by Dr. Seuss and Prednisone I wrote this little poem about a month ago, while “patiently” waiting on an oil change that was taking way to long. At the time it distracted me from the very real side effects that had started to effect me after being on multiple medications for a month. Most notably in that moment, I was starting to get just a tad pissy. The night before my daughter read Oh the Places You’ll Go by Dr. Seuss to me, still one of my favorite kid books. Fueled by frustration and silly rhymes, I banged out my Ode to Prednisone…I share it now because some days honestly just suck. The side effects have only worsened since I originally wrote this. Irritability, moon face, weight gain, red skin, fatigue, minimal sleep, swelling, dizziness, confusion, and I am sure I left out a few. That being said, I am handling it. I know it could be worse, and I am assured that the side effects are temporary and should resolve when I am able to come off the medication. I share this now for two reasons. I have seen many posts recently about the frustrations of Prednisone on the support site I joined for IgA Nephropathy, and think this might resonate with you all. The second reason is I just needed to vent about it for a minute. So thank you for listening, and hope you find the humor in my rant.

Ode to Prednisone

Thief in the night you, you steal my sleep.

And my jawline you do keep.

My waistline long since forgotten.

Web of confusion I get caught in.

Appetite out of control

Can’t be filled,a bottomless hole.

What’s that my hair is starting to thin?

And red is now the color of my skin.

Sad farewell to my ankles,

Start of sandal season for my cankles.

Oh dear, my cheeks have grown again

Mood swings range from one to ten

Like a nasty little whore,

I don’t want you no more!

I’m sorry did I call you a whore?

Damn what else is in store?

Deep breath and remember it’s not forever.

Just a few months and we can sever.

You better save my kidneys you little fucker,

Don’t want to end up the overinflated sucker.

So I am sorry for what I said on Prednisone.

Come on…Let’s get an ice cream cone.

KTS

4/6/19